There are suppressed feelings, needs, and longings in us that are crying out saying, “Just let me be me and love me for who I am!” When we find these, they often feel quite young.
And there are learned rules of behavior in us that speak back to these little ones saying,
“It is not safe to let you be you. It would be dangerous for you to be seen or to express yourself. Stay hidden.”
Sometimes these impasses are just below the surface and sometimes they are hidden beneath so many layers that we don’t have any idea that the longing or the struggle even exists. We just know that we have never been as alive or as free or as satisfied as we would like to be.
This is the work of developmental trauma healing, attachment healing, relational healing. It is subtle, nuanced and tricky. We are working to ensure that it becomes safe enough – and then to feel or “know” that it is safe enough – for the places that have been hidden to come to the surface and to be part of us.
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